things are hard and beautiful.
when i focus on my wants, it makes things harder. my selfishness takes over and i just want to be surrounded by the things only familiar to me. running into the opposite direction my Pappa wants me in is enticing.
"go live. live on a land you can help cultivate, away from oppression and injustice. away from all hate and anger. away from the lies of this world. live in peace with the ones you love, creating delicious colors to share with each other."
then i remember that doesn't make all the hurt go away. my neighbors just can't escape the displacement that they're in. they can't escape the worry of paying rent, the discrimination of having an accent and the constant lay-offs happening daily. how selfish living a life, ignoring such pain God's children hold.
i often wish my heart wasn't in a constant state of vulnerability towards my brothers and sisters in need. i've come to see my heart is not complete without them.
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